Dating

Dating for me is a relationship where you are getting to know each other better with the possible intent of taking things further into something serious and committed. You don't have to be sleeping together to be dating, in fact generally you should wait until you are exclusive before doing so. You are getting to know each other on a personal, emotional level.

Friends with benefits situations are where there is no intent of something further, it is just for sex/"benefits" and not about the person, the interaction, the future you have together. Sometimes one person does want more, but this does not make it "dating"...it is still a casual "FWB" relationship because at least one person is not intending for it to go any further than casual sex.

For somebody dating is when a man calls me in advance for a time to meet and go out and where he has done most of the planning for the date. We go out, enjoy each other's company and at some point within the first 5 dates we probably kiss, hold hands, etc. In the first 5 dates the subject of marriage comes up in general along with career and family goals, etc. If I learn that he is not interested in marriage/family I don't see him again - same if we don't have compatible values. This is how it's very different from "friends with benefits" - the men I date are not just "for fun" or for sex (I won't sleep with a man I am casually dating) - the purpose is to learn more about each other and see whether we have potential for a serious long term relationship. From what FWB sounds like, that kind of interaction has no such goal.

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